The Quince Scale
Avid readers of my blog may recall a post I wrote concerning the Camembert Scale... well, this morning saw the conception of a whole new grading system for life; this time, regarding pretentiousness.
This weekend was the 15 year reunion of the Cardiff University A Cappella choir. Since I haven't been in the country for any other reunions that may or may not have been organised in the past, I was jolly chuffed to be able to attend this one. Well, some of it. I met some of the chaps for coffee and a free concert by the Cardiff Blues Choir yesterday morning, at which, I felt the need to explain the Camembert Scale since much of the music with which we were graced was extraordinarily cheesy. Not quite on the same level as John Rutter, perhaps, but cheesy nonetheless.
This morning, a breakfast had been organised at a well-known greasy spoon but by the time I arrived there were only two others present and no prospect of anyone else joining so we decided that, as none of us were keen on said lard-fest, we would try the museum coffee shop. On the way over there, we got talking about Fay's sudden fetish for reptilian taxidermy. Apparently, Fay is doing a piece of performance poetry on Friday the 13th, and a stuffed snake is necessary... Picture my blandest of bland faces at this point... Fay freely admitted to it being utterly poncy and nigh on beyond pretentious. Jan and I were hard pushed to disagree at which point Fay nodded and decided that we needed a scale similar to the Camembert Scale with which to designate pretentiousness... A pleasant 5 minutes or so was spent laughing over which symbol would fit the bill... quail eggs... grouse... a few others were similarly dismissed, perhaps Fay or Jan could remind me... we finally agreed on quince.
Quince have been deemed sufficiently poncy as to be an adequate representation of something being pretentious. Therefore, the word pretentious will no longer be used, instead it will be represented by a grade out of 5 on the Quince Scale. As in: "Terri's comment that the museum had no cake forks was 4 quince worthy..." Such is life...!
This weekend was the 15 year reunion of the Cardiff University A Cappella choir. Since I haven't been in the country for any other reunions that may or may not have been organised in the past, I was jolly chuffed to be able to attend this one. Well, some of it. I met some of the chaps for coffee and a free concert by the Cardiff Blues Choir yesterday morning, at which, I felt the need to explain the Camembert Scale since much of the music with which we were graced was extraordinarily cheesy. Not quite on the same level as John Rutter, perhaps, but cheesy nonetheless.
This morning, a breakfast had been organised at a well-known greasy spoon but by the time I arrived there were only two others present and no prospect of anyone else joining so we decided that, as none of us were keen on said lard-fest, we would try the museum coffee shop. On the way over there, we got talking about Fay's sudden fetish for reptilian taxidermy. Apparently, Fay is doing a piece of performance poetry on Friday the 13th, and a stuffed snake is necessary... Picture my blandest of bland faces at this point... Fay freely admitted to it being utterly poncy and nigh on beyond pretentious. Jan and I were hard pushed to disagree at which point Fay nodded and decided that we needed a scale similar to the Camembert Scale with which to designate pretentiousness... A pleasant 5 minutes or so was spent laughing over which symbol would fit the bill... quail eggs... grouse... a few others were similarly dismissed, perhaps Fay or Jan could remind me... we finally agreed on quince.
Quince have been deemed sufficiently poncy as to be an adequate representation of something being pretentious. Therefore, the word pretentious will no longer be used, instead it will be represented by a grade out of 5 on the Quince Scale. As in: "Terri's comment that the museum had no cake forks was 4 quince worthy..." Such is life...!
posted by OrientBird | 17:43
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